15 April 2003 22:39
Lamentations 3:39 "Why should any living man complain when punished for his sins?the "well, duh" nature of jeremiah's question grabbed my attention last time i read this. and of course i was thinking "well, duh" until i started to do a little soul searching. i've done my fair share of complaining recently. i'm always trying to figure out what happenings in my life i should attribute to God. there have been times in my life where i could see the hand of God, the way everything lined up in order for something to happen. or the opposite side, i've had a time or two where door after door shut in my face, preventing me from taking a particular path. there's also the whole "is this God saying no, or is this God trying to test my perseverance?" issue. this is a survey of some of the things running through my head when something fails to happen the way i had intentioned it to happen.
Deut 8.5, Prov 3.11-12, Hebrews 12.5-8
"Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father?
at this very moment, i take great encouragement from these verses. but for some reason i'm not such a happy camper when i'm actually suffering the consequences of my behaviour. today i had the raw nerve to think "i've already learned this lesson, why do i need to learn it again?" God probably just shook his head in rueful amazement. at one point tonight i was frustrated to the point of wondering whether this God is worth the trouble of believing... now a scant five hours later the words of Asaph come to mind (Psalm 73:22), "I was senseless and ignorant; I was a brute beast before you."
I can't figure out which is more amazing.. God putting up with me, or my fickleness.
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