30 May 2004 00:02
the human mind is a curious thing. mine, for one, is a seething mass of contradictions. take change for example. in many things i am abhorant to change. in others i thrive on change. i don't particuarly like it when new and modern things arrive. i don't like it when my tried and true ways of doing things have to change. i don't like it when i have to go from the practice i've had all my life of going to school and start working full time. but i love seeing new things, new territory, exploring the world. after i've lived in one place for two years, i start to get anxious to move somewhere else. yet it's interesting, after i go on a trip somewhere, after i see a bunch of new places, after i move somewhere and change the entire setting around me, i still have a penchant for returning to the places i've been. returning to the tried and true places i've experienced, the ones i know are interesting and safe. after exploring perhaps 10% of a new area, i settle down into a groove, staying sheltered within that 10% that i am already familiar with, unwilling ot explore further, despite the fact that it didn't kill me when i found the first ten percent in the first place. I move to a new area and meet a certain number of people in the first two weeks, then after that i make few if any further efforts to widen my circle of aquaintences. is it complacency? i want to explore the remaining ninety percent, but i feel like the known ten is a safer bet to be interesting and secure.00:02 email me permalink / commentary (0)
